Love me
by dollars1991
Summary: my first lemon   please be kind    when squalo finally breaks down,what would our dear boss do   i mean xanxus not tsuna   summary sucks right haha
1. Chapter 1

**Love me **

**Warning: contains boys love, don't like don't see haha**

**Pairing: Xanxus X Squalo **

**Disclaimer: I do not own KHR … even if I pray every night that I do~ **

"VOOIIII! What the fuck is this! That idiot!"

The Varia was once again in a mess, once again in its bloody glory mess. Everyday was the same, its either there was not enough meat or that the wine taste more like blood and in some occasions it seems that somebody had stuff all the toilet paper into their butt. But all in all they all ended in the same way, dead people, destroyed walls and basically scenes that one could only see in some horror film.

All this would then be cleaned up by one person and only one (cause everyone else would be either dead or barely alive and those would are smart enough were gone even before all these started) our very own captain Squalo.

Normally, Squalo was used to it, who wouldn't right? But today was different… different because he was tired, because he was sick of it, because today should be special even if no one remembers, maybe deep down he wanted this day to be special.

Today was his birthday.

Well, it was actually not much of a big deal, it not like the Varia is like some fluffy-all-loving family like the Vongola, and nobody really cared about one another….

"But this is fucking too much! What kind of shit day is this! Where the fuck are you, you stupid boss ! I swear I will kill you!" Squalo ranted while he made his way through the war zone finding that good-for-nothing-should-be-better-dead boss.

This day started as lousy as possible, Levi and Lussuria had disappear somewhere (you do not want to know where) so that mean no breakfast and no house work done. Bel and Fran seemed to have their day off somewhere doing some very "active" exercise (poor Fran ^^ ) and as for Xanxus he was gone the moment Squalo opened his eyes.

You see, Squalo and Xanxus shares the same room as it is more convenient for their daily "activities" but they were not lovers… they were never lovers even if Squalo hoped they were… and it hurts but he knows he was nothing more but a useful outlet for Xanxus.

But this does not matter to Squalo, for Xanxus to acknowledge his existence was enough…. really it was enough. Even if there were times that he felt lonely, hurt or just plain tried but he can stay by his stay, if he could just look at him, he would be fine …. He could go on ….

This was an obsession, Squalo knows that …. He knows that this was just a sick obsession that others may call it love. But there was no such thing in Xanxus dictionary, sex was there… but not love.

So this morning, he did everything, and everything includes, missions, cleaning, cooking, cleaning, buying groceries, cleaning, training and did I mention cleaning?

Everything was fine, until their beloved boss wanted some of his wine and ordered him to go get it and then he came back to a war zone… all his cleaning gone to waste, all his DAMN BLOODY CLEANING!

Well, after all that finding in the piles of bodies he found his boss, sitting on his chair , drinking his wine( why buy when he already has it ? I don't understand either.) and all he said was " Trash!"

Squalo did not understand why he loved this man, the very one that didn't give a shit about him. He was tired, always trying to impress but all he got was well "trash". Then Squalo was laughing, maybe he went mad, maybe he really cracked this time. He was laughing yet it hurts so much, so much that there wasn't pain anymore.

Well that shocked Xanxus, he give him the "what the fuck is wrong with you" look, then Squalo laughter died….

"I must be one damn sick person right? Sick enough to be willing to stand beside a person that won't even look at me, one that didn't even care that I died. I'm tired Xanxus … sorry… I don't think I can make it like this. Sorry…."

With that a single tear when down his face, but that was not the end of it many others followed and soon our ever strong (and loud) captain was having his very first breakdown in ages (who knew when he last cried?).

At that time, Squalo actually thought that he would get the death sentence immediately for showing such a weak side. For that the Varia was not one that had a weak side. But instead of some flying object hitting him, he was enclosed in strong arms. Then he realized Xanxus was hugging him, he WAS HUGGING HIM! To say that Squalo was shocked was clearly an understatement, he could not even move for god sick!

'You are cute like this you know. Wait, before you get angry listen to me first kay? Xanxus muttered into his hear.

Xanxus gently wiped his tears away.

"I'm actually waiting for you to show me this side of yourself, I always wanted to see how far you could go, how far I could push you. But now I saw and I realized that it hurts me. It hurts me to see you in pain. I can't say that I love you, that's because love seems very farfetched to me. But I know that I cannot leave you and if that is what people say to be love, than yes, I do love you."

In a split second, Squalo was red, very red. His boss just said that he love him, the very boss that nearly destroyed his life, the one that fucking-hell-took-him-as-trash-and-wanted-him-no-better-then-dead boss LOVED him. OMG! The world must be ending right? Wrong! Cause there was more to go, who knew their boss was such a fluffy pervert (okay, so maybe we know about the pervert part~).

"But Boss I –

"Shhh~ Call me by my name, you were calling me Xanxus then, right? Say it again." Xanxus whispered sensually into his ear causing a tremor right through his body.

" Xan..Xanxus mmh!"

Lips met and the party begins…

_Lemon part young kids close your eyes now!_

This kiss was different, Squalo knows it, he could feel. It was like somebody had change his blood into molten lava but yet the kiss was so gentle. So gentle from a man that once hold so much power.

As Xanxus tongue slowly caresses his, it seemed like all he energy was drained from his body. Xanxus notices his "weakening" body and carried him bridal style to a place where it is more proper for their activities aka their bedroom.

When they finally reach, Xanxus lowered him down on to their bed gently and hovered over him, they watched each other for a few seconds. Xanxus eyes soften.

"You truly are beautiful."

He caresses Squalo's flushed cheeks and captured his lips once again.

"Xan… ahh…Xanxu…s.." Squalo moaned into his mouth as Xanxus reached into his clothes. He then start to strip Squalo and himself. In their full naked glory, Xanxus start attacking Squalo's neck marking him as his. He continues his markings till he reached one pink little nipple. He licked on it gently than roughly, making small circles around it and suddenly biting down gently on it.

"AH! ahh…. Ugh …. Xan..Xanxu…arh! st…top…arh… please I … I'm goin.. ma..d"

The pain and ecstasy was killing him, but it felt so good.

Xanxus did not stop, he continued with his ministrations and when he was finally done they both were turned on as hell.

"Xanxus… please…I need you…ugh… now" our little shark panted with his face flushed, eyes teary and body that was speared open across the bed. (Nosebleeds)

"Fuck! You would be the death of me you know!" Xanxus cursed while in his frantic search for lube.

When the cursed lube was finally found Xanxus places a large amount of it on his fingers and entered them slowly into Squalo.

"Ugrh ~"

Squalo felt the finger moving in him, stretching him and messaging his insides and suddenly…

"Ahh!"

Xanxus chuckled, he finally found the spot.

To Squalo's disappointment, Xanxus removed his finger but they were immediately replaced with something much bigger.

"Ugh! Arhhhh!"

" Gods Squalo! You're so tight!" Xanxus moaned

He waited for Squalo to get used to him, and then started slowing thrusting into him.

The thrusting, slowly became more rapid and their pants became more disorientated. A changed of position cause Xanxus to go deeper and each thrust hits Squalo's prostate dead on.

"Ahhh… Xanxus… I can't ... I'm ahhh! Wha-"

"Ugh… cum with me." Xanxus muttered out while preventing Squalo from his own climax.

After a few more animalistic thrust, Squalo's wall once again tightens around little Xanxus (ok~ maybe its not that little) and Squalo felt something warm spread through him. But Xanxus did not came to his climax alone, he brought his little shark with him and the evidence is now all around his chest and abdomen.

_end of lemon, ok open your eyes now_

This was the first time that Squalo came with out having to touch himself or with the help of Xanxus and surprisingly he liked it … it felt good… I mean really good.

In the past sex for Squalo was painful, both physically and mentally. It was just sex then… just sex.

It not like he can't take it rough, in matter of fact he always took it raw. However this was different, this gentleness was different he did not want to lose it but he didn't know how to keep it. So he did the only thing that he knew, he hugged him. He knew this may seem weird, two grown man hugging but he can't let go … he just can't.

"Please… don't leave me… don't leave me like this… please I beg you…" he voice came out so softly almost like a prayer. He didn't like this weak side of him but he just couldn't help it. Tears then keep falling out from his eyes, as if they did not belong to him.

"Shhh~ don't cry… I don't know what to do when you cry…. I won't leave so don't cry anymore okay?" Xanxus cooed while kissing his tears away as if each kiss was a promise of him staying by his side.

Xanxus flustered look was actually quite a scene and that cause Squalo to let out a chuckle through his tears and that chuckle grew into a major out burst. Normally, Xanxus who have killed the very person that laughed at him.

But this time he didn't, even he himself did not know why, he didn't feel angered or humiliated instead he was actually quite pleased with himself making his shark laugh. He concluded that he likes his shark's laugh, he like him smiling because of him.

Feeling those staring eyes, Squalo finally stop his laughter.

"What? Don't look at me like that." He said while turning his head away, which was due to the fact that he was blushing like crazy.

"It's late, rest." Xanxus patted him on the head and pulled him into his arms. This made Squalo even redder for the record but than after awhile listening to Xanxus heart beat tiredness too over, he was overcome with sleep cause this time he knew for sure Xanxus would be there once he wake. He would be there.

Seeing his shark drifting of to LaLa land, Xanxus smiled. He begins to help clean themselves up and when the clock strike 12. He took out something from the lowest drawer of the bedside lamp.

It was a ring, a simple sliver ring with a golden band around it. It had Xanxus initials curved in the inside of it, he helped his shark put on the ring and a matching pair shown on his other hand with Squalo's initials.

"Good night, my shark and happy birthday."

Ends =)

OMG! This took me a freaking long time to finish… hope it is not too hope (if grammar was human I would freaking kill it) I know it is a bit ooc … okay fine! It is very ooc…. But it can't be helped~ it came out like that… I always want Squalo to have a good relationship… so it came out as fluff haha.

Anyway I was thinking if I would like to make it a squeal with the morning after etc~ But I not sure what to write….

So please review if u like it ^^

I would think of something soon !


	2. the morning after

**The morning after**

As the light slips in through the windows of The Varia household, it brought on a sense of morning with it. Well, it was like any other morning yet there was something different in the air... …Something really different.

The place was dead quite.

It was not like the oh-my-God-somebody-is-going-to-kill-me-and-I'm-going-to-die kind of quite. It was more of the oh-my-God-if-somebody-is-not-going-to-kill-me-I-will-kill-myself kind of quite. To know exactly what caused this, we must all return to early today.

**About exactly 2 hours 27 mins and 18s before**

'_Squalo-chan! We're back!' _

_Yup! We all guessed it, that was our ever hyper (ever loud) sun gradient, Lussuria._

'_Shishishi~ Everything seems to look the same' Bel scanned his surroundings which consist of bodies hanging up like decorations and blood spills like it was apart of the wallpaper. _

'…' _(This was from both Levi and Fran. Just for all you out there, they came back too~)_

_So everything was fine~ just fine~_

'_I thought I asked Squalo-chan the clean up the place?' Lussuria frowned._

'_Shishishi~ Squalo-chan should be playing with Boss shishishi~, come froggy let play too!'_

'_Senpai…can u stop touching…' our monotone child finally speaks._

'_Boss…boss…' (I don't think we need to guess who was it from~)_

'_Squalo-chan where are u-_

'_shishishi, froggy play with the prince-_

'_Senpai…-_

'_Bossu~'_

_Our elite members of The Varia was starting a little commotion on their own, which ended up with newly added decorations and freshly painted wallpapers. _

'_Would all of you shut the fuck up!'_

'_bos-'_

_They all said in unison and paused in unison._

_It was not because of the newly found hole in the wall nor was it due to the multiple broken glass bottles on the fall (I really do think that Xanxus have and obsession for breaking glass bottles and cups). Xanxus, their ever cold, ever inhuman, ever bastard (provide from the courtesyof Squalo) boss, was carrying someone… bridal carrying someone. That someone was none other then our sleeping captain…_

'_Squalo-chan!' Lussuria was to first response and the rest of the crowd were rooted to the ground with and 'Omg! The world is coming to an end' look on their faces. Even the ever expressionless Fran had his jaw 3 inches above ground level. _

_Squalo stirred a little from his sleep from all the commotion but was cooed back to sleep by his boss cum new lover. (Sorry I had to add that ^^) _

_Well, if staring could kill, Lussuria would already a million feet under the ground. But unfortunately it could not and lets face it Xanxus do not need staring to kill, he could kill even without opening his eyes._

'_Make breakfast." that was the last thing their boss said before making his way to the bathroom. (Note that he didn't even bothered about the dead bodies)_

**Returning to the present (after 2hr of stoning and starring into space and trying to convince themselves that it was all just one weird dream. Seriously, did you really think the above conversion needed more then 2 hrs. Okay I admit that I did know what else to write…*runs away and hide in some corner*)**

'O…okay… the prince should wake from his dreams now…that was not really real right?' Bel turned to Levi just to see that the guy was on his knees suffering from some mid- term crisis. Not wanting to know anything about Levi's love life, he quickly turns to his little froggy (who just got his jaw back).

His froggy did not answer him, but he knew something was different about his frog. There was a newly found emotion in his eyes and the prince guessed it to be some kind of envy.

So his frog likes this kind of romance…. And being the genius he is, he thought of something. Something that would make his frog very happy… (But this story would be continued the next time)

**In the bathroom.**

'Er... Xanxus…' Squalo called out from his sleep, maybe it was due to the sudden contact with water, Squalo finally woke from his dreams.

Trying to resister his surroundings, Squalo looked around only to realize that his boss was bathing him.

'Xan..Boss! Wha-what are you doing? I ca-can do it myself!'

Xanxus frowned at the change of names, but none the less he answered him.

'For starters, I'm cleaning you up and no you can't do it yourself cause I say so (cocky bastard, no pun intended) and didn't I tell you not to call me boss?'

They stared at each other for a moment, and then Squalo spoke, his voice barely above a whisper.

'So that wasn't a dream?' his little shark looked at him with such insecurity with so much doubt in his eyes. He then realized how much his shark had suffered due to his own dilemma and it pains him. For the first time in his life, his heart hurts form someone else.

Xanxus eyes soften, he grab hold of one of Squalo's hand and showed him the ring. Before Squalo could say anything, Xanxus showed him his matching ring.

'This means that from now on you are mine. I forbid you to show anyone else this side of you. Because if you do I will make sure that named person would not be able to see the next sunrise.' (Due to the fact that the person maybe dead or just blinded for life, that is if his lucky enough.)

Squalo looked at his ring, many emotion passed through him. The whole thing felt so like a dream, yet the ring felt so real on his finger. I didn't dared to speak or even move as if a single action from him could change everything.

'Don't cry on me again, okay?'

Squalo finally looked up at him with question marks printed all over his face.

Xanxus laughed, he touched his left cheek then slowly he kissed him softly on his lips.

'I don't know why but I don't like see you cry, it make me feel so… so worthless. But I like your smiles; I know you do smile so next time, smile for me.'

Squalo did as what he said and was reward with another deeper kiss.

**Finally, Breakfast.**

So it was near noon when they ate their breakfast, everyone was there even the one with the mid-term crisis. For the first time everyone ate quietly, then…

'HA~CHOO!'

Like an automatic reaction, took off his overcoat and place it on Squalo and immediately "killed" the nearly air-con.

So for those who were smart, they all knew that from this day on The Varia had a new boss and that the ninth was right, Squalo was meant to be the boss.

**Afternote: **

**Yeah I did it! Its done! I know its kinda short….Hoped it came out alright **


End file.
